...If it is your will.

Jesus never concluded a prayer for others with the phrase "...if it is your will." At least that is what Dallas Willard says in Celebration of Discipline. I havn't actually fact checked that one - but I'm going to accept it at face value for now... it is a pretty well respected and widely read book.

For some reason that really surprised me and captured my attention today. Prayer is such a mysterious thing. I feel very dichotomous if I think about it, because I know through both accumulated knowledge and experience that God answers prayers. I know the theological truth in my head, I've experienced it first-hand, and I've heard too many other personal stories to count. Yet still, so often, I pray with this "if" mindset, if not the exact words. He goes on to explain that using such a phrase is completely appropriate when seeking God's will in our own lives - and Jesus did the same. But when praying for someone else, it is so easy to approach it with uncertainty. It is a thought provoking reminder to consciously consider how I am praying.

Photos

I added two small albums (less than 2o pictures) to Picasa. Thought I'd post some slideshows here. If you'd like to see larger images, click on the pictures and you will be taken to Picasa.

Puente Romana

This roman-era bridge is near our house - it's on the way to and back from Ryan's school. It's reserved for foot traffic now. It's clearly not big enough for cars and trucks. This slide show is of the best pictures we've taken of it over the last nine months. As cool as it is, it's actually difficult to get good pictures of - partly because of the modern, not-so-cool, bridge right next to it.


Boats

Just a few more pictures of local boats. If you've seen previous boat photos I've taken, you may start to recognize a few.

Thomas Merton

The person "...who has meditated on the Passion of Christ but has not meditated on the extermination camps of Dachau and Auschwitz has not yet fully entered into the experience of Christianity in our time."

Holy Leisure

"If we are constantly being swept off our feet with frantic activity, we will be unable to be attentive at the moment of inward silence. A mind that is harassed and fragmented by external affairs is hardly prepared for meditation. The church Fathers often spoke of Otium Sanctum, "holy leisure." It refers to a sense of balance in the life, and ability to rest and take time to enjoy beauty, an ability to pace oursevles. With our tendency to define people in terms of what they produce, we would do well to cultivate "holy leisure."

This passage is from a chapter on meditation in Richard Foster's Celebration of Discipline. It got me thinking about how it does seem that much of my experience in American Christianity is one of frantic activity and defining ourselves by what we 'produce.' I think in that we are reflecting our broader American culture. I have heard many sermons about taking sabbath, but little more than making sure we take a day of week to rest. I also think that it seems many pastors (and missionaries) are driven by proving we did not choose this vocation because it's 'easy' - trying to prove to a rightly cynical world that we are productive. It is a pressure that I feel keenly (mostly internally) as we are in our early days here in Spain.

I know that this idea of holy leisure sounds good, and that I often choose to pursue other forms of leisure that add to the cacophony and frantic activity instead. I know I do not experience this sense of this holy leisure often enough, but I have experienced it enough to know it is good and life giving. I am sure I am not alone, and that many of us would benefit from pursuing God through this.

Christians and Politics

Here is an interesting reminder of how we can engage in politics without losing our soul. I think #10 was the reminder I needed most as I can feel pretty frustrated with politics at times.

This post was my introduction to a blog that seems to be pretty interesting overall. I'm not crazy about the name, but the author of smartchristian.com definitely has some interesting things to say.

Who am I becoming?

In the aftermath of my final oral exam today, I've been thinking a bit about what I'm doing, and how I'm doing. As you might guess at that statement, it didn't feel like I did all that well - I won't know how I did until I see the results. But I can say that I've felt a lot of pressure, mostly internal, to really 'succeed' at learning Spanish. Obviously, if we want to not only survive here, but thrive in running a business and ministry, it's of the utmost importance. To add to that, I certainly feel added pressure to perform well because in a very real sense, this is my job at the moment. It seems simple enough - one thing. And there are many fantastic people who are sacrificing their prayers and finances for us to be here. So the felt pressure can be very real to me.

It's not something I readily admit, because it doesn't fit with my adaptive and flexible personality, but I do give quite a bit of thought and emotion to the things I am doing, and the next things I will be or ought to be doing. It was in this context I was reminded this morning of some words a friend spoke at church long ago. He was talking about following God's lead - seeking for his will and his leading. He made the point that it's not about what you are going to do, but it's about who you are going to be. God has made this point to me very clearly before, and for me, it's a powerful message, one that I tend to forget if I don't revisit it. I'm quite certain that God is far more concerned about who I am becoming than what I am doing for him. But I forget that too often. So today I am considering if I am living my life according to that reality. Am I spending enough time seeking God on who I am, and who I am becoming? Or am I spending more time and emotion than I ought on what I should be doing?

I definitely have lots to do - both now, and in the future. But I want to make sure I don't forget the importance of becoming who he is calling me to become in the midst of seeking a path forward as we figure out each next step.

Images of Santiago

Our friends Larry and Megan visited in May. They made this video of their time spent in Santiago. I enjoyed the images they captured and wanted to share them.